The word relationship is formed with two words relation and ship. Truly these are just vehicles of emotions or names we attach to our near and dear ones; children, spouses, friends, siblings. Every relationship is lived to complete a certain purpose in this universe and in every relation we live on a certain plane, be it physical, be it emotional or psychological. For any particular motive, if any particular relationship has been formed and is not fulfilled then we get distressed, pure acts of selfishness, yet selfishness that comes with its own virtue. Actually to understand this attachment on a psychological, physiological or physical basis we need to understand that it is all because of the rnanubandhana with that person. Anybody we live with, touch, associate with, is due to a past association with that person. Whatever the association in the same aspect we get is attached to that person and expects the completion of the incomplete karmas or action with that person.
Before we live any external relationship, we need to first understand and analyse our inner relationship with our own mind, body, soul and this universe. If we all understood that, we all will be living better relationships with every second person around us. At the end of the day, every relationship is meant to give us pleasure and happiness but if that doesn’t happen we get disappointed. Different people have different temperaments, different lifestyles, different physical and emotional levels, hence there is bound to be disappointment in some manner or the other. In fact, the only way to drive and derive ultimate happiness is the way of giving and not expecting. Any relationship by its definition is complete surrender.
The second most important thing is to live a life of celebration, a life of fullness, a life of complete fulfilment. Beyond that, in every relationship, there has to be certain responsiveness and responsibility. Having ensured that, one also needs to be free of any kind of fear attached to any relationship that is close to one’s heart. One logical question after everything else that we need to ask ourselves, whether we always fall in people’s expectations of us? When we are outside people’s expectations, can we expect our relationships to be within our expectations?
Any pain or discomfort associated with any relationship also happens when we see others different from us. The day we unconditionally accept these people to be a part of us or go beyond the physical dimension and not attach importance to physical body, then there is no hurt or conflict.